I don’t understand what I want: how can I find myself?

Some people know from childhood what they will be when they grow up. Others are searching for themselves all their lives. They try, they fail, and they try again. Many people spend more than a year realizing that they are not in the right place: at work, in relationships, or in society. It seems that you can only learn your true purpose through the experience we have gained from this very trial and error.

Yes, one really finds his job by testing himself in different fields. And from the very beginning one follows the path that his parents or society imposes on him. And here it is already a matter of losing connection with your desires, interests and with yourself in general.

If you are still searching for yourself and do not know what you will be when you grow up, this material will help you gather your thoughts. Specially to The Fashion Vibes, transpersonal psychologist Robert Oksuzyan talked about how to get to know yourself and understand what your purpose is.

Robert Oksuzyan, transpersonal psychologist

First of all, you must understand that, relatively speaking, you do not lose yourself in search of yourself. I advise you to shift your attention to another question: do you know yourself? Apparently not.

Accordingly, it’s time to fix it. The acquaintance starts with the questions you ask yourself. For example: where are my boundaries?
These boundaries define what you really want and what the world around you wants. What do you like, what do you dislike, how can you be treated and not. What is good for you and what is not; It neither stresses you out, nor relaxes you, on the contrary.

There will be many such moments, and in each of them a part of your personality, your attitude to the environment will be revealed, and gradually, over time, you will notice how you begin to look and you will leave the position of “I lost myself”.

When we honestly answer the question about our desires and tastes, we are already close to understanding ourselves.

A person is lost when they stop understanding who they are in the system. By living not for yourself, but for your parents, for society, for someone else, you lose your own value and shape. In this state you have no personality and so you cannot understand why you are living, what you are striving for, what you are doing and for what.

Remember what you really love

One way to know yourself lies in the phrase: “Make your hobby your job and you won’t have to work a day in your life.” In this sentence, the key to answering the question of what is your place in the world. Think about what you can do and what you’re ready to do, even if it’s for free just because it brings pleasure. For example, you don’t drop your smartphone and shoot countless stories – why not make it your business and become a professional content producer? Or did you do a great job as a bridesmaid and enjoy organizing your friends’ wedding?

Follow and think about such moments in yourself, maybe this is your purpose and profession that will inspire you?

Talk to friends

Sometimes we ourselves do not realize our strengths that are evident by our environment. They themselves say we’re great, but we don’t take these compliments seriously, but we should. It can be helpful to talk to your friends and ask them what they think you are good at; what strengths do they see in you; In what situation would they turn to you for help?

Such a simple sincere conversation will open the door to many new things for you and you will be able to see in yourself something that you did not care about before. This will help us understand ourselves better because it is difficult for us to analyze ourselves but it is more visible from the outside.

Seek help from astrology and numerology

The natal chart will also help you find your destiny. This is your personal book with operating instructions, relatively speaking: who are you, what are you about, why and what can you do?

You can use numerological diagnostics. They are very good at letting you know who you really are. You can also self-diagnose using human design (a system for your abilities and limitations, calculated using data from date, time, and place of birth). All this will also clarify what exactly you should look for in yourself.