Christmas: the 5 worst comments heard during pregnancy during the holidays (and what to say)

You’re pregnant ? Congratulations. If this is your first pregnancy, you are discovering or have certainly already discovered the pleasure of the symptoms related to it (nausea, tiredness, headache, back pain, etc.). If that wasn’t enough, your food options also became significantly limited, and you had to say goodbye (or see you later) to sushi and alcohol, among other things.

But as if pregnant women don’t already have enough to integrate into this new life, it’s also a time when just about everyone indulges in a comment here and there or an unsolicited piece of advice. To our great joy.

Christmas and the end-of-year holidays are no exception, on the contrary, since this period brings together families near or far with whom the affinities are sometimes not evident… Between the grandmother of the older generation, the intrusive mother-in-law or the annoying uncle, a small anthology of the worst comments made to pregnant women at Christmas.

“If you don’t eat, this child won’t eat anything”

Yes, you noticed, it’s definitely an observation from your grandmother or grandfather. The other variant, launched by your cousin Quentin, could also be: ” I have a friend who continued to eat sushi…“. This observation, if you wave away your aunt Claudine’s homemade foie gras dish or if you confirm to your host that no, you can’t eat oysters, could therefore very well land on the corner of your nose.

Obviously, ” If you don’t eat, this child won’t eat anything » is a completely false statement. Here is an example of a possible response, polite version: “ Thanks for your suggestions grandma, pregnant or not, I eat what I want. Furthermore, this observation is completely false. A baby’s ability to have an appetite or taste anything does not depend on the mother’s diet during pregnancy.“. For a slightly cheaper version, which Manon Portanier, manager of our Daronne section, could have recommended to you, we recommend: “ Your oysters, you can put them where I think“.

“Come on, take a little cup of field, it won’t kill this baby”

I know, the first answer you would like to throw in your interlocutor’s face is definitely: ” It’s you I’ll kill.”. But remember, the end-of-year holidays, the Christmas spirit, everything else.

The debate over alcohol consumption during pregnancy is perhaps most common this time of year. And for good reason, in France alcohol is an integral part of the national culture. There was a time when we even gave it to very young children to drink… Just look at how alcohol is rooted in our culture: even if you are not pregnant, if you don’t drink in the evening, they will all immediately be criticized, criticized or even suspected.

So let’s remember this once and for all: Yes, drinking alcohol during pregnancy is dangerous for the fetus.

Some suggestions for answers, then: “ Yes, drinking alcohol during pregnancy is dangerous. I want to take even a small risk, even if I have half a chance that nothing will happen, eh Jean-René? Well no. You wouldn’t make me drink alcohol if I wasn’t pregnant, so why the sudden obsession?“. More direct version: “ Go make yourself an egg, Jean-René ” OR ” You know where I put your camp bowl‘? “. Now you got rid of Jean-René.

“Are you sure they’re not twins?” »

your older cousin Josiane tells you, her eyes glassy, ​​as she looks you up and down, just as you’re about to help yourself to another slice of log.

So yes, you know why Josiane says this, you’ve gained a few kilos, but not only is that normal, since you’re creating a little living being from nothing, but it’s nobody’s business.

There, clearly, the only advice we can give you is to ignore it big cousin and smile proudly at her, shoving a spoonful of logs into your mouth. Because yes, you are 6 months pregnant and if they were twins you would know it, and she would also know it beforehand. So leave her in her gratuitous malice.

“How much have you already got?” Ah, that’s for sure, holidays don’t help.”

Your older cousin Josiane returning to the attack, not satisfied with the ignorance you have shown her up until then, with her mouth full of logs. But seriously, what is this question: “how much have you already taken?” » ? Who cares about business besides you, really? We wouldn’t imagine asking the same question to a woman who isn’t pregnant, and that’s the worst part.

This time, here’s what you might answer: “ Yes Josiane, I am 6 months pregnant and have gained weight. And you know what? This is completely normal. And I’ll probably keep taking them, vacation or no vacation. Does this concern you? NO. I’m not asking you if you’ve lost all your back teeth given the state of your front ones. Ok, now, do you really think that pregnancy is a time when we would or could go on a diet? Even if it means putting yourself or your child in danger? That’s life, and I’m sure you were very good at waiting for your two idiot children too.“. Another tip: “ Do you have any other stupid questions?“.

“So, what are you going to call him? Not Jules, I hope?” (fat laughs)

Aaaah, the choice of name. If you or your partner is pregnant, this is most likely one of the topics you will hear the most about during the holidays.

A simple question” did you choose a name?“Okay okay. On the other hand, and the dividing line is quite thin actually, if you don’t directly interrupt this exchangeunsolicited advice on names you perhaps hate, criticism on names you adore, or even on THE name you have in mind in this case, are likely to rain.

So answer: “ Jean-Georges, don’t you realize that your observation is stupid? Who tells you that Jules isn’t the first name we chose for our son? Don’t you think this is, therefore, potentially very embarrassing and unpleasant? Apart from Jean-Georges, in your opinion, we really have nothing to do with it“. Manon Portanier’s version: “ Jean-Georges, you know what they say, opinions are like bullet holes, to each his own.”

Unfortunately, there is no polite response to this remark other than well-placed contempt in the form of silence.

Now you’re a little better equipped to handle this high-pressure time, but don’t forget: You’re the only captain of your ship, and this pregnancy is your business alone. So, good luck and happy holidays!

Listen to Laisse-moi kiffer, Madmoizelle’s cultural advice podcast.