Bye Bye Judgments: 6 Tips for Living Your Life Without Worrying About Others

Come on, let’s be honest for a second: who hasn’t spent hours wondering if their latest Instagram story was a little embarrassing? Or what would happen if people in the office judged us after this little incident during a meeting? We’ve all been there and it’s normal! After all, we are social beings, we need to feel loved and accepted. But when it turns into an obsession, it can quickly become a real ordeal. So, how can we stop worrying about what others think of us? Come on, we’ll figure this out together.

The trap of other people’s gaze

Be careful, I’m not saying you shouldn’t care about what other people think at all. We’re not robots after all! The problem is when it takes up too much space in our lives. When we start changing our behaviors, our decisions, just to please others… then it becomes toxic.

If you spend your time trying to guess what other people think of you, molding yourself to fit their expectations… It’s exhausting, isn’t it? Not to mention you’re missing out on the real you. And frankly, that’s a shame, because I’m sure the real you is awesome!

Taking Back Control: Instructions for Use

Come on, enough chit chat, let’s get down to business. Here are some tips to stop caring about other people’s opinions:

1. Reality Check: No One Thinks About You as Much as You Do! Okay, that might sound a little harsh, but it’s the truth. Everyone is the center of their own world. That mistake that keeps you up at night? Chances are, no one else will remember it. Phew, right?
2. Stop the movies in your head : We love creating doomsday scenarios, don’t we? What if they think I suck?«, « What if they think I’m weird?“…Stop! Unless you have super telepathic powers (and if you do, call me!), you can’t know what other people are thinking. So what’s the point of torturing yourself?
3. Distractions, the best medicine : When you feel yourself starting to ruminate, do something. Nothing! Listen to your favorite playlist, go for a run, clean out your closet… The idea is to occupy your brain so that it stops revolving around these negative thoughts.

Change perspective

You know what? Our brains are a bit vicious. They tend to focus on the negative rather than the positive. This is called “negativity bias.” Nice, huh? But don’t panic, we can fight it!

4. The hunt for compliments Next time someone compliments you, write it down! In your phone, in a notebook…whatever. The idea is to have a little reserve of positivity on hand for those days when you’re feeling self-doubt.
5. The facts, only the facts When you start to worry about what others think, take a step back. What really happened? Not what you imagine, just the facts. It helps put things into perspective.
6. Talk about it! If something really bothers you about a particular person, why not talk to them directly? Be careful, no accusations like “You hate me, right?”. Keep calm, express what you feel. You might be surprised by the result!

Well, let’s be realistic: we’re not going to stop worrying about what other people think overnight. And that’s okay! The important thing is not to let this worry take over your life. Life is too short to spend it worrying about what other people think.