"Experience is open to everyone" : psychologist Estelle Dossin describes Married at First Sight

Without much explanation, are you happy with the final results of this new season?

I’m happy with all seasons, including this one! (Laughs). If we have decided to introduce people and get married, it is because we believe in it.

What do you personally like about this adventure?

At first there was a real intellectual excitement. In psychology, the problem of love compatibility has been studied since the 1930s, it has always been at the center of concerns. Therefore, it is exceptional for me to be able to participate in a life-size experiment on the subject and make the whole profession think.

What are the different stages before we get to what we saw in the broadcast?

You should already know that the protocol is very long. Some contestants sign up for the show a year and a half before it airs. The initial selection is made by the production. They eliminate people who are unmotivated or already in a relationship and want to change! Then Gilbert Bou Jaoudé, a sexologist, and I meet with potential candidates and give them tests.

What do these tests consist of?

I don’t have the right to talk about it… Their aim is to define the personality of each person, their basic variables, especially in terms of values, psychic movements, tastes…. Once a very precise psychological profile has been drawn, fitnesses can be established.

How do you get the nearly perfect match?

This is a long, very time consuming and… top secret job! (Laughs). The audience sometimes wonders and doubts whether the prospective bride and groom met before the ceremony… And the answer is no. They have no information, they don’t know each other, they don’t talk to each other. They just make an appointment with the notary – because it’s a real marriage – and hear their own voices there. I believe that a person who tries to find out who to marry at any cost has no place in emission.

Why do you think people refer to Marriage at First Sight? We imagine that not everyone has the capacity to accept this leap into the void…

Yes, and those who do not have know from the beginning and do not know. There are also those who think they can do it and give up in the process. Totally respectable. Freedom of expression and action is very important in this program.

Do the nominees of previous seasons give you their news?

Certainly ! Not only did I bond with those who were married and divorced, I also kept in touch with their loved ones. I speak regularly with Damien’s aunt (season 6), Pauline’s mother (season 6), Alicia’s (season 6), Gaétan’s father (season 3)… It’s a human experience we don’t get.

Do you feel like you’re sometimes stubborn about the fate of some couples, as Jessica and Pascal created this season?

NO. We are not forcing anything or anyone. We establish harmonies between two people, we offer them a union. It is up to them to bring this couple into existence with their desires, capacities and also limits. When they face challenges, we’re there to accompany them on and off the camera. We never say we’re wrong. People are compatible, there is nothing wrong with us.

You look stressed, even active, like the candidates during the ceremony…

Yes, because they are what I call “little weds”. I am very attached to them. I remember a groom who spent all day calling me for a year. He was insecure and in need of approval. He found peace in my eyes.

Is the wedding night a scary moment for them?

Above all, it is a moment of sharing and intimacy beyond sexuality. And like most people who get married, they usually sleep that night because they’re tired. It’s not really a party under the duvet! They enjoy waking up together the next day and getting to know each other.

You formed a same-sex couple for the first time this year. Want more variety in the show?

Same-sex marriage has always been a possibility in the Marriage at First Sight experience, but until now we haven’t found a couple who are compatible and motivated enough to bring them together. Likewise, I am often asked the question: “Why not old people?” There are registrants, but a population less comfortable with footage and cameras. As for people who seem less attractive than others (because I am often mentioned about them), they are very sensitive to criticism posted on social networks. They are less confident, sometimes feel bad about themselves, and give up a lot more than others. But the experience is open to everyone!

Interview with Amandine Scherer