“If we stop drinking alcohol, we have to constantly justify ourselves”: Juliette, 32, talks about how she stopped drinking alcohol

I have never consumed much alcohol and I have never found much pleasure in drinking it. I have always had occasional consumption linked to convivial situations such as family gatherings, aperitifs with friends or colleagues. Now that I think about it, I have never consumed alcohol alone.

Feeling out of step

My first drinks date back to high school and the first nights where everyone tests their limits (and often exceeds them). I was often the one helping friends who were too drunk to go to bed, making them take a shower when they threw up on themselves, putting them in PLS… The perfect nurse!

I always came home from these evenings feeling out of place, half envious and incomprehensible.

What is the need to put yourself in these states? Why did everyone enjoy it? Did you laugh even though it didn’t seem crazy to have your head in the toilet?

Student life, drinking more and ending up in bad conditions

I went to study in another city where I didn’t know anyone. I discovered student life, late nights and what excessive drinking was like. Once again, I felt out of step. While I had a great night drinking a few pints, my neighbors drank much more and ended up in a terrible state.

I’ve had some nice nights, but I’ve rarely stayed until the end: the company of drunks is not always very pleasant.

There was always a turning point in the evening, when it was no longer possible to share anything (discuss, joke, dance or even just a quiet moment).

During these studies I met a group of friends who have a relationship with alcohol quite similar to mine: relaxation yes, but rarely excessive consumption. Now I wonder if the relationship with alcohol and evening behavior influences the birth of friendships in one way or another. Personally, I have always been struck by people who drink a lot of alcohol, a mixture of fear and the desire to be able to let go completely to the point of feeling sick.

Overcoming the Automatic Side of Alcohol Consumption

Today I am 32 years old and I have a personal sports project that requires me to be in great physical shape. Last January, for challenge and fitness, I decided to stop drinking alcohol (translation – let’s say enough with my approximately 5 glasses of alcohol per month). I didn’t miss it. Out of curiosity I continued in the months of February, March, April… And I still haven’t missed it.

After a few months I adjusted my rules of the game: I gave myself the right to jokers. For special occasions, often social, or if I really want to have a drink, I have the right. Now I really ask myself if I want to drink alcohol or if an alternative without it would make me just as happy, if it is the situation that pushes me to drink or not. This flexibility allows me to overcome the “automatic” side of alcohol consumption and to overcome the “social pressure” effect. Since January I have had two drinks.

By not drinking alcohol anymore we have to constantly justify ourselves. No, I am not pregnant, yes I still like to party, no it is not a choice linked to a religion… It takes a lot of patience, second degree and detachment to accept being judged, more or less frontally, as a “not fun” person because we do not drink alcohol. We are still there today despite the awareness.

A choice that makes those around you reflect

However, once the conversation is over, new habits sometimes appear: friends no longer automatically come home with a bottle of wine, we detail the non-alcoholic options in bars a little more, we change terraces because Perrier-mint is too expensive… I think my choice makes those around me think about their alcohol consumption. My boyfriend drinks less, some friends talk to me about their relationship with alcohol, my parents adapt their aperitifs when I come to their house… It makes you think and above all it makes you discuss and debate.

I wanted to testify that quitting alcohol can also be motivated by the desire to truly control one’s desires!…