A good bartender like a hairdresser can sometimes replace a psychologist. Coming and talking to a stranger can sometimes save you from bouts of self-flagellation during PMS, arguments with your boyfriend, and expensive spontaneous purchases. The key is to drink in moderation.
But keep in mind that bartenders don’t take the Hippocratic oath, promise not to divulge others’ secrets, and generally don’t owe anyone anything (except for delicious cocktails).
Meanwhile, special to celebrate today’s Bartenders Day, The Fashion Vibes columnist and Gastrology Telegram writer Anya Baturina asked eight beautiful men to tell their guests the weirdest, funny, interesting, inspiring and absurd stories they’ve ever heard.
Attention, the stories are funny but they can scare children and especially sensitive ones!
Anya Baturina, author of the Telegram channel “Gastrology”
Grigory Mostivenko, head bartender of the Peruvian bar Alpaca
One day, a very respected wine producer from Europe came to one of the bars where I was working at the time. He brought with him a rosé sauvignon with a few bottles of his own wine and explained how he developed this new variety because of a joke from one of the bartenders in our bar.
He tried something called pink sauvignon at one of our parties (this kind didn’t even exist in nature back then). This happened when our suppliers were late for alcohol delivery, arriving later than usual, and we didn’t have enough time to inspect what they brought us, so we urgently started selling – guests asked. It was then that one of the bartenders summoned the rosé wine with which he poured sauvignon. After the guests returned to the bar, they liked it so much, they tried to order it and even said that they looked for it elsewhere.
So much so that that wine producer was so surprised and satisfied with the taste that when he returned, he started to produce a new variety and succeeded. This is how a new grape variety could be born from a simple joke. By the way, it turned out delicious!
Lava’s ideologue and head bartender Mikhail Pugachev
I think it was Friday because there were a lot of guests at the bar. A young couple, maybe 35-40 years old, stood out from everyone with their positive energy, saturated with a kind of sincere love for each other, felt from afar. They joked, laughed, enjoyed life, I must say right away that I wasn’t working with these guests, but I really wanted to talk to them.
– You are very happy, very loving, very sincere, do you have a special evening? – I asked.
– Yes, – they replied with a smile – We finally divorced.
Sergey Galitsyn, head bartender of Bshushu and Capito
The guest told a funny story about how he got into a fight with another visitor in a bar. He is taken to the chin area, holding his chin, a doctor comes up to him and asks what happened. He says he probably broke his jaw. The doctor decided to joke and said, “What hurts you?” He answers: “Teeth.” “So you probably need to see a dentist,” the doctor replies. Unable to restrain himself, “Maybe to the gynecologist then?!” The puzzled doctor looks at him and adds: “Well, I have *****.” After this dialogue, everyone in the emergency room slid down the wall laughing.
Konstantin Gorbachev, former bar manager of Bijou
I’ve heard a lot of weird stories from guests, but here are two of my favourites.
One man, St. He said he saw an unusual scene in St. Petersburg. A couple was sitting at the next table, the lady wearing a fur coat. He ordered Prosecco and decided to manage the man with a glass of beer. The waiter brought two glasses on a tray, put the prosecco on the girl, and accidentally knocked over the glass the camp was on, soaking her from head to foot. He immediately got up and left, and the man had a very quiet but serious discussion with the waiter, took out his phone, turned on the camera, and started filming. When my guest turned around, he saw how the waiter poured another glass into the middle of the hall and poured it on his head. The man took it off, chuckled and left.
For the rest of the evening, all the guests and other waiters discussed this issue. Oddly enough, the bartender laughed very loudly: “Well, what’s he like?!” And the next moment, a glass of beer fell from his hand! The hall just burst into laughter.
The second story happened to the guest (the other). He came to the restaurant with his family, sent his son to the children’s section. But something went wrong and the TV in the children’s area started showing porn instead of cartoons because one of the employees downloaded them from the Internet to a USB flash drive, but did not check it. “Cinderella” came with a surprise.
Delis Manager Dima Potapov
My story is very complicated. A little sad, but also funny. A lady came and said she would drink vermouth and vodka. To remember grandfather, so to speak. The bartenders and I asked Grandpa what happened. He replied: “Yes, everything is fine, he died like a rock star in a nightclub under a prostitute.” To be honest, I’m sorry for both! A guest comes to us to celebrate his grandfather’s birthday or death.
Andrey Korobkov, senior bartender at Sangre Fresca / El Copitas Bar
Once, three years ago, Herb Dean, the chief judge of the UFC (mixed martial arts championship), came to visit us at El Copitas Bar. note. ed.), works well in the brightest title fights. To be honest, I’m not a big fan of fights but we definitely had something to talk about all evening. He talked about the drinking culture in other countries, how he likes to come to Russia and what kind of “spiritual” people we have, and our delicious drinks. He liked our bar so much that he decided to invite us to open his own bar in San Francisco in 2024. Let’s keep our fingers crossed and hope everything goes well.
Nikolai Kiselev, co-founder of El Copitas Bar and Sangre Fresca
Often times, when you serve mezcal to guests, they chuckle and say, “Mmm, mescaline?” Can you imagine how many stories of this kind we’ve heard in eight years? Mezcal is a beverage and mescaline is a substance, there is nothing in common between these two concepts. And here’s another one of the dumbest yet most frequently asked questions to bartenders: “Are you dancing here at the counter or at the tables? Where’s your fedora hat? Where did Banderas hide? An interesting connotation is that if the bar is associated with tequila then it must be danced on the table.
Nikita Alexandrov, Bijou bartender
This story happened to my friend but he told me at a bar. It all happened one unfortunate morning, after the party we took a taxi home in a big company. First, the hero of the story came out and went to breakfast. And that’s it – she disappeared, did not respond to messages. We were a little worried, but we knew he liked to get into complicated situations. After a while, he took a photo from the taxi … in his winter clothes and slippers.
So, at 6 am, our friend, who had a frantic desire for a tom pit, went to the local Tanuki for an after-party meal and liters of alcohol. The idea is solid and it’s not far to go home, so I would too. After ordering the food, he leaned back in his chair, rested, and erased the memory of that night from his mind. However, her thoughts are interrupted by a waitress who brings a double whiskey from a mysterious girl at the next table – beautiful, mature, and drunk as hell. Sharp forms, sullen lips, sharp claws and fangs are a drunken socialite who finds his victim.
That woman’s piercing gaze prevented me from fully enjoying the hangover soup. He was already holding his breath, watching her every move. Then he offered to come over and chat with me. The stranger, word for word, touched the glass cup, his hands, and the cat purred without taking his eyes off it for a second. In the middle of the conversation, he closed the account and hinted that the conversation would continue at a nearby hotel. A black business class car arrived for the main characters of the story and drove them to the luxury hotel “Ukraine”. The continuation of the acquaintance did not last long: a few hours later the lioness woke our hero and told him to go quickly, as her husband would kill him if he found out anything.
After hastily ordering a taxi, he drove home – in hotel slippers, no hat, no sneakers, and an Apple Watch. Needless to say, these things never got back to him? He tried to find them the next day but to no avail. But this story ended leaving questions behind who was this lady, what did she do in that institution on the outskirts of Moscow, and why in that institution and not me.
Source: People Talk
Errol Villanueva is an author and lifestyle journalist who writes for The Fashion Vibes. With a passion for exploring the latest trends in fashion, food, travel, and wellness, Errol’s articles are a must-read for anyone interested in living a stylish and fulfilling life.
