Your child is missing attention? The alarming signs that all parents ignore

Negligence, an often invisible problem

Unlike physical violence, parents’ negligence often goes unnoticed. It includes the lack of care, listening or encouragement on a daily basis. According to a systematic revision of the Royal College of Landscape and Child Health, The negligence in early childhood increases the risk of cognitive, emotional and social disorders.

Interested children have more linguistic delays, academic difficulties and greater vulnerability in the face of anxiety or depression.

The delicate balance of parents involvement

However, the above can be equally problematic. In fact, if the absence of attention weakens the child, the excess of involvement is not even without consequences. For the other extreme spectrum, some parents, animated by good intentions, can involuntarily limit the development of their child.

Stanford researchers have shown that too intrusive parents can hinder the child’s autonomy and their ability to solve problems alone. Finding the balance must be present, attentive, but also to make room for experimentation, error and independence.

Recognize the signals of alert of a lack of attention

The signs of lack of attention may vary according to age:

• In small children : linguistic delays, isolation, aggressive behavior.
• At school : difficulty of concentration, drop in results, feeling of invisibility in the classroom.
• In adolescence : Excessive search for external validation, risk -so -rischi or social isolation.

These signals must notify parents, but also teachers, doctors and relatives, who play a key role in prevention.

How to offer greater attention to everyday life?

Experts remember that it is not about dedicating your child every minute, but of cultivating moments of quality. Here are some practical paths:

• Create listening routines : Establish a discussion ritual every day, dinner or before bedtime.
• Encourage quality over time : even ten minutes of sincere exchange and without distractions (extinct phone) can strengthen the connection.
• Evaluate efforts : Congratulating the child for his progress, ideas or initiatives, rather than focusing exclusively on the results.
• Share simple activities : Cooking, reading a story or taking a walk are all opportunities to connect.
• Encourage autonomy : Let the child try, make an error and learn, while guaranteeing an emotional security network.

Support parents to prevent negligence

The lack of attention is not always voluntary. Professional constraints, precariousness or psychological effort can contribute to it.

Parents to support parenting (first 1,000 days, the welcome places of children, parents’ coffees, etc.) are essential to help families. But on an individual level, Ask your loved ones for help, take the rest time Or use parental support structures can already make a difference.

Find the right measure between presence and autonomy

The key lies in a posture that psychologists call “The available presence”. It is not a question of being constantly behind the child, but of being accessible and receptive to his needs. Concretely, this means offering a stable picture (clear rules, attention and affection) while the child explores, experiences and sometimes fails.

A useful point of reference for parents is observe the degree of request of the child : When trying to share, ask questions or ask for help, he needs support and listening. On the contrary, when manifested the desire to do it alone: ​​dressing, solving a problem, testing a new activity. The role of the parent is to get back slightly, remaining available if necessary.

It is in this back and forth between proximity and distance that the child’s internal security is built. Feeling supported when he needs and encouraged to take initiatives when he is able to do it, he develops both self -confidence and self -confidence.

Attention, a vital need

Research converges: parents’ attention is much more than a gesture of tenderness. It is a vital necessity for the mental and social health of children. Ignoring this reality is to weaken their emotional bases. The good news is that it is never too late to change. Every moment of attention counts, even if it is short and helps to build a feeling of safety and personal value.