Help, my son is starting school and he can’t adjust!

Daronne is the queen of not-so-silly advice, covered with a large dose of more or less subtle humor. Here she is again to help a reader!

The question for Daronne

Dear Daronne,

My 3 year old son just started school and things are going very badly. Every morning since school started, he refuses to go. When it’s time to leave the house, he has a meltdown, he stamps his feet, rolls on the floor and screams until his vocal cords break. Once at school, he stays alone in his corner and is rude to the teacher.

I feel helpless and sad, seeing him like this. Deep down, I think I’m afraid, could he be fired? How can I help him?

It’s my first time too, help me!

Jade

Daronne’s response

My little pumpkin flower,

DON’T PANIC! It’s September 13th and your little one has just started school, he will get used to it, I promise. We have never seen a child removed from school because he was angry with the teacher, so don’t worry.

Start by reassuring yourself

I understand that this is your first child, and therefore also the first time you go back to school. Contrary to what many people think, going back to school is not trivial, neither for children nor for parents, who are often the most stressed in the family!

Were your children raised in a community? Maybe you imagined that everything would be wonderful, but that is not the case. First of all, know that everything is normal. For children, starting school represents a very big change: they are no longer looked after 24 hours a day as they used to be, whether they were looked after by a nanny or in a nursery. School is the big moment, it also means new faces, new friends, a new authority figure that they have not yet mastered, different schedules and different rhythms.

Of course, this is upsetting for him, and you can see it clearly, so it worries you. But your child can recognize his parents’ anxiety, and this won’t necessarily help him if he sees that you are panicking about leaving him at school. So, have a cup of tea or do some meditation and relax!

Make light of it and talk

Is it a little better? Secondly, you will have to reassure your little one.

First of all, let him know that if he wants to talk to you, if he has things in his heart that he wants to share, you are there to listen to him and let him vent. So, lighten the mood. Let him know that you think it’s great that he’s going to school, that he’ll make new friends and that he’ll have fun. I’m not telling you to promise him wonders, and I also advise you not to promise him that he’ll learn to read or write, because that’s not at all in the program of the small section and he risks losing him. being disappointed. On the other hand, you can present things to him in a positive way. Explain to him, for example, that he’ll soon make new friends, that he’ll learn to draw, that the playground is so much fun…

Of course, if your child is rude to the teacher, you have to explain to him that it is not right, that everyone deserves respect and that above all at school you have to obey the teacher and not send him home.

Finally, don’t forget that he is only 3 years old and that at that age it is completely normal to react like this. I am sure that the owner is aware of it too! And you will see, once he feels better at school, he will end up relaxing…

The kiss.

Your Daronne.