Getting informed during pregnancy: between nonsense and instinctive injunctions

If you’ve ever gotten pregnant, especially if you work on a computer, you must, like me, spend a good portion of your day on the Internet. We quickly open a window between two emails to type “twin beta-hcg level”, “pizza cheese not very well cooked pregnancy” or, universal search: “alcohol 1ᵉʳ month risk fetus”.

Become a mother and dive into the depths of the Internet

What then appears before our eyes? At best, “news” sites dedicated to the subject, covered in pink and dripping with tenderness. The baby is a “baby”, the mother a “mom”, the pregnancy” the most beautiful masterpiece that can be created “. Then you find blogs about diaper brands, where objectivity is discussed in the simple fact that their purpose is to make us buy their products. At worst, you end up on forums, the sociological abyss of sweet motherhood. Beyond beyond an incomprehensible coded language (the “gygy”? THE “bribry”?), we immerse ourselves in a vision of motherhood where each micro-event is described on 3 pages, where the mother appears passionate about her pregnancy and her offspring, expert and… a bit silly. Here, it says.
Pregnancy information on the Internet is the responsibility of “buffoonery”, if I join Pihla Hintikka and Élisa Rigoulet in theirs Feminist guide to pregnancy, “infantilizing the woman, limiting her intelligence and her ability to name things, making the plan to have a child foolish”.

Get practical information during pregnancy

There you are, in your thirties, watching pregnant women out of the corner of your eye, fearing your feminism will dissolve into motherhood as you smile at the idea of ​​mixing your genes with your partner’s, and there, when your belly it’s not finished yet and you don’t realize you’re really pregnant, you come across these sites and think to yourself: is this my life now?

Pregnant, I was so desperate for the mediocrity of the information available on the Internet that I fomented the project of creating a scientific journal site to give parents an alternative.

Rest assured, another kind of information is available to you on the Internet if you are not a very kind mother: that transmitted by the Amazon, wild, nursing until it is no longer thirsty and giving birth singing in a river. .

If you want to know about the epidural, you can for example read on the site of a self-proclaimed therapist that this medical technique is a “comfort harmful to the child”. You feel itIs pressure building up on your shoulders?

Knowledge retention

This type of discourse is often accompanied by a form of knee-jerk injunction. Pregnancy is natural, your body knows the way, WE ARE BORN FROM THE STRENGTH OF THE TIMES, listen! Vibrate! Do not think too much! Woman, don’t look for information, listen to your instincts, don’t you feel it? Sin !

Yes, the so-called maternal instinct starts there, when you have a few lentil-sized cells in the womb.

I remember one midwife almost refusing to answer my questions, blaming me too much intellectualize “. It was necessary ” Tact when I wanted to understand. After disinformation, I came across knowledge retention.

It’s like when mothers refuse to say that our anus becomes cauliflower after childbirth, based on “he’ll have plenty of time to find out all this”, “let’s keep the mystery”. What is pregnancy, a scavenger hunt? Surprise, hemorrhoids!

What do we do with future mothers who want to consciously get involved, as informed women far from the Judeo-Christian models of motherhood?

It is true that we talk about pregnancy, postpartum and that we hear more about the reality of motherhood when we take the time to look. But information easily accessible via an Internet search remains confusing and insufficient.

Lack of reliable information about pregnancy

Around 700,000 women give birth every year in France. Why are major media sites not picking up on the topic? Why hasn’t the World Health Organization or the Health Insurance already created a complete and reliable website about pregnancy? Why do we read everything and everything about dietary restrictions? Why don’t so many women know what their perineum is for? Why do the 1,000 questions a pregnant woman asks remain side topics confined to candy-pink sites full of pubs? The Jungle of Motherhood begins with the misinformation experienced during pregnancy.

Recently, some light has been shed on endometriosis. Today we know that it is not normal to have pain during menstruation to the point of staying in bed for three days. It might be worth considering that a woman about to conceive another human being doesn’t even have to spend nine months in the dark, stuck between commercial worries, reactionary visions of motherhood and the fantasy of the wild woman. .

I take this opportunity to share some books that have helped me understand, ease guilt, and find voices that are like me:

• The feminist guide to pregnancy by Pihla Hintikka and Elisa Rigoulet (Marabout – 2019)

• Pregnant, anything is possible by Renée Greusard (JC Lattes)

• MAMAS, a small summary of the deconstruction of the maternal instinctby Lili Sohn (singer)

• Birth in comics by Lucile Gomez (Mama Editions)

• Wellness and motherhoodby Bernadette de Gasquet (Albin Michel)

• Mothersby Claire Bretecher.

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