It can be unnerving an ex who suddenly reappears in her dreams when we thought we’d clearly moved on. Especially if it’s an erotic dream and we’re back together with someone else in real life… But does this mean that our unconscious continues to desire this being from the past?
Dreaming about past relationships says a lot about those in the present
That’s the question answered by Deirdre Barrett, dream researcher at Harvard University and author of Pandemic dreams AND The Sleep Committee.
This PhD holder in clinical psychology just explained to the New York Times what could it mean to dream about an ex partner:
“Triggers can include the anniversary of a death, a breakup or a divorce decree. But dreams can also be a reaction to how we feel about our current relationships. »
In other words, dreaming about an ex is not a betrayal of your subconscious, nor an excuse to text him so you can hear from him innocently, but rather a I invite you to reflect on your current emotionsDeirdre Barrett continues:
“The very notion that we deal with death or breakup in an ‘all or nothing’ way is misleading. Life is a constant attempt to “move on”. These things never quite go away. »
Ouch.
The hypothesis of continuity or how the dream follows the diurnal reflections
The article by New York Times then continues with the analysis of three different dreams. And the first dream turns out to be especially interesting. It’s about a man who dreams of his ex-wife even though he’s remarried a woman and his current relationship is going well. He dreams while he watches in the company of his current partner through a window, her ex leaning on a table without her seeing them. And without them wanting to reach her and interrupt her serenity.
Before this dream, this man was starting to want to contact his ex again, but he hesitated. But the fact that he wakes up feeling like he’s dodged a bullet would actually illustrate a form of thinking about the question, and also an answer, according to what’s called the hypothesis of continuity. According to this theory, anxieties in our dreams may mirror those in our waking life, as if the dream was a direct continuation of the reflections taking place in real life.
Don’t take your dreams too literally
In other words, dreams are rarely to be taken literally. (thanks Captain Obvious). If we are lucky enough to remember them in detail, it is rather the outline of the dream that counts, and the elements above all have a symbolic meaning: seeing through a window someone who leans on tablewithout us wanting to join it, there can be so many markers of desire to keep such a person at arm’s length, For example. AND in addition to the plot of the dream, the feeling that you feel good when you wake up is also very important.
Far from being an exact science, dream symbolism can therefore shed some light on what is working on us in the background in real life. Something to keep thinking about.
Front page photo credit: pexels-andrea-piacquadio-914910.
Source: Madmoizelle
Mary Crossley is an author at “The Fashion Vibes”. She is a seasoned journalist who is dedicated to delivering the latest news to her readers. With a keen sense of what’s important, Mary covers a wide range of topics, from politics to lifestyle and everything in between.
