An anonymous married man turned to Reddit for guidance after discovering he had developed a sexual fetish centered on infidelity, sparking warnings from other users.
The husband explained on the platform's Sex forum that he did not want to be unfaithful to his wife in real life, but admitted that thoughts of betrayal aroused him. He noted that fantasies involving being seduced by a female acquaintance of his wife were especially appealing.
Hoping to bring the fantasy to life through bedroom role-play, the man found himself at an impasse over how to present the request to his spouse. He stated that he wanted to suggest the game without giving the impression that he wished to cheat on her, or that he would prefer her to pretend to be another woman.
Advice from forum members
The post prompted a swift response from female members of the forum, who strongly urged him not to disclose the fantasy to his wife. Commenters warned that raising the idea would likely inflict emotional distress and damage their relationship.
One respondent explained that she would feel furious if her own partner approached her with a similar request. She noted that she was so fundamentally opposed to infidelity that she could not tolerate jokes about the subject, especially if she were asked to impersonate someone she knew personally.
Other commenters suggested an alternative role-play scenario designed to satisfy his interest without threatening the marriage. They recommended that the couple act out a classic encounter between strangers at a bar, centering the script on him being happily married while his wife plays a stranger attempting to pull him into the back seat of a car.
Users also emphasized that the man should avoid referencing other women entirely during any bedroom role-play. Another contributor cautioned that coercing a spouse to say lines about hiding the encounter from his wife could derail the relationship if she already felt sensitive about the subject of unfaithfulness.
Discussions on marital intimacy
The inquiry follows a similar discussion on the same board, where a female user sought advice on how to introduce variety into the missionary position. The woman explained that she wished to remain active during intimacy with her partner, but felt uncertain about how to achieve that goal.
Reddit, an online discussion and aggregation platform founded in 2005, regularly hosts candid conversations about marital difficulties, bedroom dynamics, and personal confessions across its network of topic-specific communities. Its dedicated adult advice boards allow registered members to submit sensitive questions anonymously to gather feedback from peers around the world.
Relationship counselors and psychologists note that fantasies involving taboo scenarios or forbidden encounters are widespread in long-term relationships. Consensual role-play is often used by couples to explore unconventional desires, allowing partners to adopt fictional personas and establish a safe space for intimate exploration without breaking trust.
However, therapists caution that introducing real acquaintances into sexual role-play carries significant psychological risks, frequently triggering jealousy and insecurity between spouses. Experts emphasize that successful exploration requires mutual consent, clear boundaries, and close attention to each partner's comfort level before sensitive topics are introduced.
