What’s wrong with Eda and Serkan’s relationship in Knock on My Door? Psychologist answers

What attracted you and even made you fall in love with the TV series “Kapımı Çal”? These are picturesque places where the action, nature, the clothes of the characters and, of course, the actors themselves take place. This series can be seen as a meditative painting. But wasn’t it just its beauty that hooked us?

Especially for The Fashion Vibes, clinical psychologist Margarita Alekseeva told us why it is so interesting for us to follow the relationship of Eda and Serkan Bolat, and most importantly, how suitable they are for each other in principle.

Margarita Alekseeva, clinical psychologist

Eda and Serkan’s relationship

Where do certain genres appear in movies? Simple. When creating films, Hollywood screenwriters often resort to the works of Joseph Campbell, who created a unified and understandable system of character archetypes in the process of studying the myths of different peoples. For example, George Lucas’s book “The Hero with a Thousand Faces” was the basis for creating Star Wars. It is known that the heroes of history are classical archetypes according to Carl Jung’s system. Now let’s try to understand how they work using the example of romantic relationships in the TV series “Knock on My Door”.

Eda and Serkan’s love story is a vivid example of the relationship between the hysteroid and the narcissist. These are the most loved couples in movies due to their entertainment value. Indeed, in most stormy loves with scandals, betrayals and vivid descriptions, this is the love of a hysteroid and a narcissist.

It is very important that the psychotype itself (and the person with such a psychotype) is not bad. Each of them has its own focus of attention and its own reactions to what is happening, so people’s contact with such characters is often stormy.

A narcissist is someone who focuses on himself, his achievements and his career. The hysterical person has an external focus: How will they look at me, what will they think, how will they evaluate me. The narcissist appears quite cold because he does not need constant expressions of affection. And a hysterical person cannot exist without external manifestations of his love and care.

Why does there seem to be so much manipulation in their relationship? This is a way to attract your own attention and communicate understandably for each psychotype, to correct your shortcomings in a matter. And in this confrontation, both become alternately abusers and victims.

At the beginning of the story, Eda cannot stand Serkan, but in order to hate him more closely (a completely hysterical calculation), she agrees to establish an imaginary relationship with him. Serkan usually makes this plan to regain his ex’s attention. A narcissist has no competition. Not in relationships, not in career, not in business. The possibility of not being the best kills narcissists.

Later in the series we see the classic game of “hot and cold”. In summary: the hysterical runs after the narcissist and shouts: “Love me!”, the narcissist can even say out loud at this moment: “You and I are already together, what else do you need?” After some time, the hysterical begins to look the other way (for various reasons), and then the narcissist, out of fear that he will lose his main admirer and admirer, begins to actively, often suddenly and rudely (why ?) return the prodigal hystere to the family.

Of course, not all psychotypes are this distinct in real life. But this is the essence of the relationship. That’s why their relationship is obvious to the audience.

Trauma is added to the behavioral strategies of any psychotype. Deprived of her parents at a young age, Eda is constantly in search of unconditional love and approval. Therefore, she needs to pay more attention to herself, her personality and emotions. However, she will not talk openly about these.

Serkan, who survived his brother’s death, may have inherited the “get closer” attitude from his parents. This is a verbal or non-verbal indication to the person that expressing emotions is inappropriate or even dangerous for the emotional state.

This is where the episodes of the series in the spirit of “I need to tell you something”, which are not only used in Turkish TV series, come from. In these scenes, as a rule, both characters do not know how to talk about important things or are afraid to talk.

What about other characters in the series?

It’s not just the main characters who create the atmosphere. Serkan’s ex-girlfriend Celine is a hysterical addict. She directly says that Serkan has always come first for her. More important than any other person, even more than himself. That’s why their relationship lasted so long. It fed the narcissist the ultimate fuel: absolute adoration.

Serkan’s assistant Leila is incredibly paranoid. A person for whom it is important to do everything right or “as it should” becomes very worried if everything does not go according to plan.

Engin’s assistant Erdem is an extremely shy person. He is very active, wants to be everywhere. Actively depicts vigorous activity. It represents chaos, but most of the time these are characters that keep everyone from being too serious and important.

Eda’s friend Melek is a typical, good, neutral character who generally evokes sympathetic empathy. It creates a feeling of safe place in relationships with full acceptance and empathy. Many people dream of such a friend!

Eda’s grandmother and Serkan’s parents are like personifications of natural forces or some deep archetypes. They are against the main characters’ relationships, which adds more drama to the plot. It is possible to encounter these types in all classical scenarios.

It is extremely rare for people to act with clear intent. Most often, these actions occur automatically from the psychic corridor characteristic of each individual. And what seems to us like manipulation will be just a habitual action for a particular psychotype. But it is really interesting and exciting to observe relationships and, more importantly, to analyze them, especially using the example of a beautiful series.

Eda’s friends and relationships

Images of girlfriends are also selected according to archetypes and genre canons. It is quite difficult to be friends for a long time with a company where there are people with different life goals and interests. Unless, of course, they are all in long-term therapy to engage and immerse themselves in another person’s life with genuine interest.

But this is a popular and effective move in cinema: creating a friendly company of enough different girls so that all viewers can find their type.

What are the relationships of Eda’s friends?

The relationships of Eda’s friends, if we analyze them at a deep psychoanalytical level, are an example of the fact that you cannot build relationships only with your bright character trait.

She is looking for an angelic prince and believes in fairytale love.

Jeren needs to get the situation under control.

It is important for Fifi to leave room for herself in the relationship.

For each of them, it seems like the relationship will never work. It is not possible to say the same for the love story in which Eda and Serkan meet all their needs and desires.