A woman talks about her struggle with alcohol and drugs from childhood after she became addicted to binge drinking at the age of 14.
Abi Feltham, 35, from London, started drinking cider with her friends when she was 14, but her problem was that when they stopped, she was still hiding bottles in her room and around her family’s home.
She went from cider to hard spirits, started using drugs and hanging out with the wrong people and drinking until she dropped dead.
Now Abi, who has lived and worked in hospitality in Asia, Sydney, New York, Ottawa and Tofino, is sober before returning to her home in the UK with her mother when the pandemic hit in 2020.
Abi Feltham (35) from London started drinking cider when he was 14 and became addicted to alcohol. She struggled with her addiction for nearly two decades before she stopped drinking and became sober
She revealed that after getting sober, finding a serious partner and discovering a passion for bodybuilding, she fell in love with herself. Abi is a world away from what she was over a decade ago.
Abi explains: “Looking back, I’m sad for who I was and for this woman who had no hope. This woman who hurt herself and was so destructive.
“I would drink every day just to get drunk. I would work in restaurants and hospitality so I could drink on the job.
“I tried to end my life and I was very depressed. I’ve had mental health issues all my life and I’ve always had a difficult relationship with alcohol, I’ve always been a wild child who was rebellious and partied too much.
Abi, now in the picture,
The former addict admitted she would drink from the moment she woke up and throughout the day
“I was in a relationship with a man who got sober, but he introduced me to crack cocaine and I got into this really bad cycle.
“I would spend all the money I made from my job directly on alcohol any day. My boyfriend at the time went to work and I drank a whole bottle of tequila that day and he came home and I was just drunk.
“I drank from the moment I woke up to the moment I fell asleep and I didn’t care if I lived or died. It got to a point where my boyfriend I was dating in New York put me on a plane to Canada to live with a mutual friend because he couldn’t handle me anymore.
Abi, who is now pictured, admitted that during her binge eating she dated a man who was sober from alcohol but didn’t want to crack cocaine.
Abi lived all over the world and embraced the party lifestyle, but she was deeply unhappy and was admitted to a psychiatric hospital for three days after attempting suicide.
“There I tried to end my life and was admitted to a psychiatric hospital for three days, but I never made the connection between how I felt and how much I drank. As soon as I was outside, I started drinking again.
“I could hide it from my family because I only showed them the things they wanted to see. You will only see the good parts of my life.
When the pandemic hit, Abi was living in Canada, but everyone around her who traveled there went home, so she finally decided to do the same.
She explains: “I think being in the house I grew up in and being in the house I grew up in helped a lot. It was like holding a mirror up to myself.
After the Covid-19 pandemic forced her to return to the UK, Abi said it was like holding a mirror up to herself and giving up drinking.
After her recovery, Abi met her new boyfriend at the gym, who she described as “amazing”.
The recovering alcoholic focused on herself and her mental health to overcome her alcohol addiction
“I took a good look at myself, I had so many lows and I was exhausted because I was in such a low and dark place. Being in my childhood room made me think and I think it changed the way I think.
“I think I realized that I want to live and improve my life. I wanted things to improve sooner, but I didn’t think it could, and the moment I realized I was powerless over alcohol and all my choices, I got a little hope.
“I think one of the most important changes is that I started to like myself a little more. My self-esteem was so low that I couldn’t care less about my well-being because I hated myself so much, but once I started making positive changes to my lifestyle, I respected myself a lot more and as my self-esteem grew, I many others did. areas have also grown.
Abi said she feels more stable and in control of her decisions since she quit drinking and is now pursuing a career in marketing
“I now have a career in marketing, with career prospects and a future of development, not just waitressing and fast food work. I also just moved in with my boyfriend who is awesome and who I met at the gym.
“This is the first healthy relationship I’ve ever had and the first time I’ve been with someone who’s nice and actually a good person.
“I started caring about my appearance and fell in love with powerlifting. That was a big part of the recovery. I now go to the gym and take care of my body. I eat well and drink water now, which I never did. I have found that the biggest change is my mental health.
“I am much more stable now than before. I am in control and make decisions that are good for me.
“It’s like all the pieces of the puzzle are now falling into place and I realized that I have to stop drinking, surrender and know that I have to let it go,” I had a glimmer of hope.
“My mom knew how I was growing up, so I think she knew what I was doing and going through. She knew about the suicide attempt and psychiatry.
“I was very open with friends and family about stopping drinking and that was important to me in recovery. To be honest with those around me, I admitted that I was an alcoholic and could not drink anymore and needed to get sober.
“Because they knew how to support me, now they know when I go to bars, pubs and parties I can’t drink and they are very helpful.”
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Crystal Leahy is an author and health journalist who writes for The Fashion Vibes. With a background in health and wellness, Crystal has a passion for helping people live their best lives through healthy habits and lifestyles.
