It is completely normal to feel anxious in today’s environment. It comes from situations where we feel powerless and unknown. In fact, we feel not only anxiety, but also a wide variety of other emotions: sadness, disappointment, anger, shame, fear. It is very important for us to communicate and support each other in order to cope with them.
In the process of communication, we are not only close, but also reduce our own level of anxiety. How to help stressed interlocutors, and what forms of communication can help and which do not help at all?
Olga Potemkina, psychologist, body-oriented therapist
Stress narrows our perception, slows down cognitive processes, and does not always make it possible to soberly assess the situation.
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Only share worst-case scenarios with each other.
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share with each other different scenarios.
In a situation of inaction, the first thing you want to do is offer your help. However, there are times when the number of opportunities to help is very limited.
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Impress your help and advice on a person, try to resolve the situation.
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Listen to the person without trying to offer a ready-made solution. If you can still help, only do what doesn’t negatively affect your situation.
Many of us have a defensive reaction – being close to the person we love in stress is so hard for us that we begin to devalue and downplay what they are saying.
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In response to another person’s feelings, say, “You are causing a panic, it has nothing to do with you,” thereby reducing the importance of their emotional state.
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If you feel that it is difficult for you to deal with the intensity of another person’s emotions, it is better to say it directly and neutrally: “I am not feeling well right now and I want to be alone with myself, can we? Shall we discuss this a little later?”
We are currently feeling a mixture of fear, shame, anger, and an unwillingness to feel shame. It is very difficult to work with them. But when we name emotions by their proper names and acknowledge that we experience them, it becomes easier.
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Do not let the interlocutor express his feelings, call them excessive and unreasonable.
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Listen to the interlocutor and his feelings. Anxiety is fueled by the unknown, so the more we hear ourselves and others, the more we understand our own and others’ feelings, the easier it will be for us.
When we talk about a person in an impersonal nature, the technique of “I-messages” helps not to shift the burden of feelings and emotions on the interlocutor.
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Tell your interlocutor: “You are tired of panicking, I also feel bad because of you, you are not helping.”
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Use the “I-messages” technique: “I feel these words hurt me too, I worry about your thoughts.”
Source: People Talk
I’m Roger Gritton, and I’ve been writing for the The Fashion Vibes for over 5 years now. My specialty is beauty news; I’m passionate about covering the latest trends, products, and innovations in the industry. In my time there, I’ve become known as an authority on all things beauty-related.
I love discovering new experts to interview, researching up-and-coming ingredients and techniques that are making their way onto our beauty shelves and highlighting people who are making a difference in the world of cosmetics. My work has appeared not only on The Fashion Vibes, but also several other publications including the New York Times Magazine, Allure Magazine and Refinery29.
